Great Lessons from Natural Divas

I enjoy learning new things about hair regardless of the teacher because I think the more you know, the more equipped you are to properly take care of your hair. I know there are some women that have relaxed hair that will only listen to information from other women with relaxed hair. While I see the merit in this approach, I think there are some limitations (which I will get to later). 


I have learned so much from fellow hair divas on YouTube (e.g. JustThisGirl1, KISSseventyseven, ninapruitt, sexymami1001, chinablk, ulovemegz just to name a few) in terms of technique, product review and basic hair care information. These women have shown me it is possible to achieve and maintain long relaxed hair as long as you have the right education. Even more, they know what I am struggling with and can make suggestions that will help me out as I bump around figuring this hair stuff out. Similarly, I have found that my natural hair divas have also been immensely helpful in terms of knowledge, product and technique as well. Now I know your probably thinking, how can someone with natural hair help me out with knowledge, hair care products or technique to use on relaxed hair? Well this is how:


1. Knowledge
When someone makes the decision to wear their hair natural they ultimately become much more knowledgeable about their natural hair structure and the elements that improve the quality of their hair. Depending on the state of your hair prior to the decision to go natural you may notice changes with your scalp, hair moisture levels and protein tolerance, things that will help you understand the way you hair should be in the first place. For some of us, we have been relaxed for so long that we are completely unaware of our hair's baseline or natural state and what looks/feels normal. Something I have learned from my natural hair sisters is the fact that many hair products meant to help our hair actually disturbs the pH balance of our hair and scalp, which leads to the many issues we have (e.g. tangles, knots, breakage, dryness). As you know the process of relaxing the hair already disturbs the pH level of the hair and scalp. Our goal then is to try to help return it to normal pH levels, which we achieve by neutralizing the relaxer. From that point on we then have to work to achieve and maintain a normal protein-moisture balance in our hair to further protect it from damage, which we do with regular conditioning and deep treatments. Knowledge of what our hair should look and feel like only helps with these goal because it will give you something to aim for.

Growing up I believed dandruff was a "natural" condition that every black woman had to deal with. And what do you do with dandruff? If you grew up in my house you scratch the living day lights out of it to "lift" the dandruff so it could be brushed away, not knowing that this act was more harmful than beneficial for the scalp. Now my lack of knowledge of what a healthy scalp should look and feel like made it hard for me to address the issue effectively. Instead, I would use products that were masking the issue or making the situation worse. Effectively stopping our hair "ills" usually only requires that we look more closely at the products we are using on our hair because your hair/scalp is clearly telling you something about that product. Point and case, for years I have been using CON thinking it was the best shampoo for my hair, based on advice and lack of adequate knowledge about my hair. I also had the driest, itchiest scalp imaginable-- it drove me crazy. So I decided to tackle it. I kept using CON and my situation never improved. It was frustrating and I couldn't understand what the problem was. Eventually I stopped using CON (not because I thought this was the problem at the time) and began using more natural products, which began my hair journey. I also began using natural oils and  EO on my scalp, which slowly began to improve the situation. With time and determination my scalp stopped itching completely and it was not longer flaking; my scalp had achieve a more "balanced" state. In comes CON. In an effort to use up the last few bottles I had, I brought it back into my regimen. Within weeks my dry itchy scalp returned. Given the fact that CON was the only thing that I had changed to my product line up I had to conclude that it was the CON causing my irritated scalp.

The point I am trying to make has nothing to do with CON itself as a product--it works wonderfully for some women. It is more about the fact that my scalp was not healthy because it had been taken far off it pH levels (by relaxing) and never returned as it should. The product I was using simply was not doing what my hair was saying it needed it to do, bring it back into balance.


2. Hair Products
While it is not always the case, most women that have decided to grow their hair naturally tend to use natural products to take care of their hair. There are a number of reasons that they do this, but the one reason that stands out is the fact that natural products can produce great results. If you have been following my blog for a while then you know I am on a mission to use all natural products on my hair despite the fact that I am relaxed. I am not going to get into my decision to relax and use natural products here, but I will say that I believe there are a lot of benefits to using natural products on the hair/scalp. A lot of companies, in an effort to save cost and raise profits, use cheap ingredients in their products, which can damage  the hair with continued use. Now this is not the case for some women. They seem to have great results with products that use mineral oil, petrolatum, and sulfates; I have not. It wasn't until I began using natural products that I began seeing results with my hair. Now I know technique has a lot to do with our ability to maintain our hair lengths, but the products we choose to use has just as much, if not more to do with hair retention. If something is coating my hair and preventing it from getting the moisture it needs and requires there is a strong possibility it will break off.

Now my hair seems to be a real snob when it comes to hair products, which is why I named her "Diva!"; she likes what she likes and doesn't apologize for it. The unfortunate thing is many women that have relaxed hair do not use 100% natural products on their hair (not including oils of course!), which has not been that helpful to me when I am searching for products to use on my hair. Much of what I have learned about natural products has come from my natural hair divas and research. I think there is this belief that if you have relaxed hair you must use products that are "tailored" for relaxed hair. Similar things have been said about using "white" hair products on "black" hair. Both of these statements are myths. Hair is hair regardless of its texture, and it has the same needs--moisture, protein and balance.

3. Technique
No one would argue that relaxed hair is fragile. Improper use of combs, brushes or heat can cause damage leading to breakage. So it may come as a surprise that many believe that curly/ coiled natural hair is equally as fragile due to its structure. It took me a while to wrap my head around this argument, but as I learned more about my hair structure I understood why this is the case. Without getting into the mechanics of hair, tightly coiled hair has its share of limitations in terms of its ability to get adequate moisture and tangles. I have three close friends that have natural hair and only one of the three has been able to achieve very long length in her natural state. The only difference between this long loced diva and my other girlfriends is the dedication and time she puts into washing, deep conditioning and moisturizing her hair on a regular basis. The other two experience breakage, dandruff and tangles and have no idea why. Now before you ask the question, I am not one to "educate" other women on their hair when I am not ask for my opinion. I think it can come off as arrogant and truthfully I am not a qualified to give anyone direction. I can share my knowledge and that's it. And as I mentioned earlier, there are women that strongly believe that relaxed women can only educate other relaxed women about hair; not naturals. But I digress....

The care and dedication I see my natural divas use when moisturizing their hair (separating it into sections, gently combing with their fingers, combing from the ends to the root) are all very reminiscent of women with relaxed hair. In fact, there are more similarities than difference between relaxed and natural hair women in term of technique. 

So there you have it. There is a lot of knowledge you can garner from a natural hair sister, so I say get as much info as you can. Knowledge is knowledge, no matter who it comes from.